Sunday, June 14, 2009

There has not been a lot of mention of my mom lately. I guess I get so caught up and used to the daily grind that nothing seems overly new. She is doing really well. We no longer go to physical therapy with Elks anymore. Instead we signed up for the Idaho Athletic Club close to home and she has a personal trainer named Patrick. He is just great. We go 3 times per week. She still goes to Speech and Occupational Therapy twice a week. This last week they told her that she will be going to Occupational Therapy one time per week. I still need to call on this because sometimes things are lost in translation with her. That was Thursday and Thursday ended up being such an aweful day. She was in such a bad mood. We went to the orthopedic/prosthetic place that afternoon to have her brace refitted. It was getting a little big. She just burst out crying. We had a little chat about pitty parties and how therapy will not be in her life forever. She is getting to the point that she has learned the skills and tools to continue on her own. What she needs to grasp is that she needs to motivate herself to do these things. She usually blames it on one of us girls for not working with her or helping her. Most of what she can do, she can do it on her own. We are a nice scapegoat. I told her that she still has HALF of her life to live. Does she want someone constantly with her because she stopped working towards independance. Seriously, she has years of life to live. Heidi said that night was pretty bad for much of the same reasons. She needs to realize that recovery of all parts of her stroke can take years. Her arm may be making slow progress now, but in 6 years it could be a lot different.

I had been noticing this lady at the gym with a brace on the right food and her fingers were curled. She looked as if she had a stroke. This last week I decided to talk to her. Sure enough she had a stroke 6.5 years ago and about the same age as my mom's. She had a very severe brain hemorrage on the right side. She had brain surgery and has since had 2 surgeries on her arm and one on her leg. She does not remember 3.5 years of her life because her brain was the last to heal. Her brain could not tell her body that it needed to do something so most times she would just sit there. My mom realized that her situation was not that bad. Some days are so draining because of the mood that my mom is in. Her favorite thing is to make you do things for her when she is now fully capable. So now all of us have to make her do it. If she really wants it she will. It is stuff like getting a snack or opening a window. She can do that. This last week, she did make cookies that were really good all on her own. She is slowly building up to being independant. My dad will still be very surprised when he gets home in a couple of months.
Gunnar and my mom are hilarious. One day Gunnar was playing with a wet wipe and wanted my mom to do everything that he was doing.
Some days are great and some days are just so draining. I still wouldn't trade the time that I have been able to be with and serve my mom. Seeing my sisters is such an added bonus. I love them both so much.

2 clever remarks:

Rachel C. said...

I hear ya sister! It is really hard when the receiver of care is not very cooperative! Especially when it's your mom!

For the last couple of months, my mom has been very angry at me off and on. Usually it's because her MS brain has told her I did something horrible, that I want to get rid of her, or that I hate her. None of which are true, of course.

Needless to say, it's made taking care of her quite interesting! Thank goodness it's not all the time!

Heidi said...

Ren did all of the blog changes for me...I still have no clue how do to it even though he showed me a few times!